


Bringing Up Black

by Beckig1983



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Kid Fic, M/M, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-29
Updated: 2018-07-29
Packaged: 2019-02-08 06:28:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12858744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beckig1983/pseuds/Beckig1983
Summary: Harry was content with how his life was going.  His son was loving his new school, the twins were enjoying having his help at the store, and although he might get lonely sometimes, his life was good.  Of course that means Draco has to come back to town and shake everything up.





	1. Chapter 1

“I’ll see you in a few hours, Caelum.”  With a last hug Harry watched as his son practically bounced up the steps to his preschool.  He had been hesitant about sending the boy to school so early but after gentle prodding from Hermione and Molly and much internal debate with himself, he had given in and enrolled him in the half day program.   Harry feared it wouldn’t be long before he gave in to Caelum’s pleading and switched him to the full day program instead.     

 

With a sigh and a thought of how quickly time was passing, Harry started walking towards Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes.  Most mornings found him there since Caelum had started school.  Occasionally he could be seen ringing up customers but most of the time he was either restocking shelves or in the back with the twins digging through journals the Marauder's had left behind.  They had developed a whole new line that was flying off the shelves from the ideas that were on those pages.  Marauder’s Madness was on pace to outsell the Wonder Witch line by the end of the year. 

 

As he made his way in the back entrance to the shop he was surprised to find the area empty.  He made his way through the curtain that separated the front of the store from the back of the store and saw Fred at the register.  “Harry!  I’m so glad you’re here today.  George is sick and will be out of it for the rest of the day.  Can you either take over for me here or start restocking some of the products?”  Harry quickly agreed and made his way to the back to grab the boxes of their most popular items.

 

The morning passed by quickly and before either man noticed it was almost noon.  “Fred, I’ve got to go get Caelum soon.  Why don’t we close up for lunch and you join me?  I can check with Molly but I’m sure she’ll watch him afterwards and I’ll come back and help you for a few more hours.”  Molly rarely turned down time with one of the grandkids.

 

“Sounds great, Harry.  Let me check in on George and I’ll meet you out front.”

 

Harry nodded as he put the last few products he had in the box onto the shelf in front of him.  He then stepped outside, raised the wards on the bottom half of the property, and conjured a sign on the door that stated they would reopen at 2.  Just a few minutes later Fred joined him, and they began the trek to Caelum’s school.  The two made small talk after Harry asked about George and were halfway there when Fred broached a subject that was normally intentionally avoided. 

 

“So, today’s Prophet says Draco Malfoy is back in town this week.  His band apparently is extremely popular, and they are on a world tour.  Doing a few shows in London.”

 

Harry cycled through so many emotions over the next few seconds he couldn’t catalog them all if he tried.  He made his best attempt at nonchalant and said “Is that so? Well, good for him.  Where were you wanting to eat for lunch?  Should we grab anything for George while we are out?”  He knew his attempt to change the conversation wouldn’t fool Fred, but he needed more time to process the fact that Draco was back in town.  It would no doubt require multiple breakdowns and several bottles of Firewhiskey.

 

* * *

 

 

The day went as Harry thought it would.   Fred, Caelum, and Harry had lunch at the Leaky, Molly agreed to watch Caelum, Harry helped Fred close up the shop, and Harry picked up his son from the Burrow covered in dirt, flour, and some substance he was afraid to examine too closely. 

 

As he watched his son splash and play in the bath his thoughts landed on Draco.  His thoughts often wondered to the man so that was nothing new, but the fear and worry were.  He had no clue what Draco’s reaction would be or if he’d even want a relationship with the boy who was currently covering the floor with bubbles and water. 

 

With a quick swish of his hand he set the floor back to rights and scooped his son out.  After brushing his teeth and a quick story, Caelum was fast asleep in bed.  Harry quietly turned out the lights and closed the door.  He then made his way into the study to write a letter that would no doubt change Draco Malfoy’s life.  He gathered the letters that he had written over the years to the blond and placed them in a box with tonight’s letter on top.  Before he could change his mind, he sent his owl off into the night and sank down into his chair with a tumbler of Firewhiskey.

 

* * *

 

 

It had been years since Draco Malfoy had set foot on British soil.  He left after completing his N.E.W.T.s as was required by his probation and never looked back.  When Father had been sentenced to Azkaban his Mother lost all sanity and had to be placed in St. Mungo’s.  One he had no desire to ever see or speak to again, the other had no clue who he was.  The friends he had before the war were either dead, in Azkaban with his Father, or had made it clear they wanted nothing to do with the Malfoy heir.  Of course, there was Harry, but it had been over 5 years ago that he walked away from that relationship. 

 

Relationship.  Ha, bloody, ha.  As if what they had could be called a relationship.  Harry had approached Draco on the train ride back to Hogwarts for what was termed their eighth year.  They both mutually agreed to bury the hatchet and simply get through the year.  After the feast they discovered that since there were so few returning students from their year, they’d all be placed in visiting professor’s quarters and only have one roommate.  Wouldn’t you know it that the two of them were roomed together? 

 

As the first term went on they both realized how broken the other one was and took comfort in each other.  First it was simply helping each other through the nightmares and being on hand to talk about them if either wanted to.  Before long they noticed they both slept better if they slept in the same bed.  That inevitably led to cuddling, which lead to what Draco liked to call “Harry Potter’s Great Sexual Awakening”.  They agreed to keep it casual and secret.  There was no need for whatever they were doing to be known by anyone.  The papers would have had a field day crucifying Draco and doubting Harry’s sanity all over again. 

 

By the time they graduated they had discussed the possibility of coming out and trying to make it work, but the public still hated Draco and felt he should be in prison with his father.  After many fights and sleepless nights, Draco made the decision to leave the wizarding world all together.  He never told Harry how he felt about him or asked Harry how he felt.  It would hurt too much to acknowledge it and walk away. 

 

They spent one last night together after the graduation ceremony and the next morning Draco packed a bag and walked away from all he had ever known and quite possibly the only man who would ever fully know who he was and still care about him.  He made his way to the Ministry to submit his diploma and sign paperwork that finished his probation and made his way down to the portkey office.  He asked for the next portkey available and found himself in America. 

 

He thanked Merlin he had thought ahead to convert a large portion of his vault into muggle currency before he left because the first few months were anything but easy.  He had no knowledge of how to live in the Muggle world and no skills to benefit them.  He had almost given up more than once and found himself drinking in a seedy bar in New York when the band that was set to play that night came out and said they had to cancel the show since their lead singer was sick.  Very few people knew that singing was one thing Draco did well.  He had learned a fair amount of muggle songs over the past couple of months and was just drunk enough to offer to step in. 

 

The rest as they say, was history.  The crowds doubled with Draco as the lead singer the first six months and by a year they were sold out constantly.  It wasn’t long until they had a record deal and a few gold and platinum albums.  No one looked at him any more as if he was scum when they heard his name.  It was what he had always wanted….wasn’t it? 

 

As he walked along the abandoned halls of his childhood home he wondered if it all had been worth it.  Had he walked away from his only chance at happiness and love simply because he was afraid of what others would think?  Why was there still some emptiness and yearning in his heart if he had accomplished what he had set out to do?  Did it even matter?  Surely Harry had found someone by now who loved him as he deserved to be loved.  There was no reason to get maudlin over the past simply because he was back in the same area as the man. 

 

He heard a pecking at the window and noticed the owl with a package attached to its leg.  He walked over to let the owl in and wondered who would have sent him something.  “Hello.  Aren’t you a beauty?  I’m sorry I don’t have any owl treats on me, but if you make your way to the owlery you’re welcome to rest and grab a bite to eat.”  He removed the package and noticed the handwriting on it.  Harry?  Why would Harry send him anything?  He placed the package on the table in front of him and settled into a chair to read the letter.

 

_Draco,_

_I don’t really even know where to start.  I’ve often wondered if this day would ever come and what I’d say to you if it did and yet my floor is littered with crumbled up letters that I’ve discarded in trying to find the words._

_I guess the best thing to do is to let the letters speak for themselves.  When you open the box, you’ll notice the envelopes are numbered.  I’m sure you have a massive amount of questions and will have even more when you finish reading them.  I am free tomorrow from 8:30 until noon.  Send me an owl and let me know what time works best for you and where you wish to meet._

_HJP_

_P.S.  I enclosed a scrapbook at the bottom of the box.  Trust me and read all the letters first._

 

Draco had no idea what the letters contained or why Harry was so confident he’d want to meet to ask questions, but he opened the box without another thought and began reading a stack of letters that would change his life forever. 

 

* * *

 

 

_Draco,_

_I really hope this reaches you wherever you are.  I need to talk to you as soon as possible about an important issue.  Please get in contact in any way at your first opportunity._

_Sincerely,_

_Harry_

_Draco,_

_I’m not sure if the owl couldn’t reach you or if you returned it without reading the letter.  It’s been 6 months since you left, and I still urgently need to talk to you about a very private matter that is too sensitive to put in a letter that can be intercepted.  So here I am, trying and hoping again that this one reaches you or that you’ve come closer than you were._

_Anxiously waiting,_

_Harry_

_Draco,_

_It’s been 8 months now.  I’ve pretty much given up all hope that you are going to get this or return anytime soon.  This is my third attempt to contact you and let you know I need to talk to you desperately.    If this letter fails to reach you and is returned like the others, it will be the last one I attempt until I hear you are back.  Merlin, Draco, I really fucking hope you come back.  I don’t know where you are or what you are doing, but I miss you more than I ever thought I would.  I feel like I should have fought harder for whatever fucked up relationship we had.  I refuse to tell you how much you mean to me in a bloody letter (that you’ll probably never even receive) so you’ll just need to drag your arse back to find out._

_Despairingly,_

_Harry_

_Draco,_

_Well, as predicted, the owl was unable to reach you again.  Honestly, I’m not sure if I’m relieved or disappointed.  My head is a mess and I go through so many emotions from one minute to the next that it’s impossible to decide.  I don’t know when or even if you’ll read this, but there’s really no other way to say this than to just spit it out.  You’re a father.  Shocking, isn’t it?  Imagine my surprise as I wasn’t even aware it was possible._

_Caelum James Black was born on the 10 th of March 2000.  It’s been a few weeks and it still seems unreal.  Most of the time he looks like a tiny version of you with silver eyes and a head full of blond hair.  I say most of the time because not only did he inherit your looks, but he’s also a Metamorphmagus which I attribute to your Black blood.  Makes it even more appropriate I didn’t saddle him with the Potter or Malfoy name I suppose.   _

_Caelum is, so far, a very quiet, happy baby.  He rarely fusses and almost sleeps through the night.  All things considered, I’m pretty lucky.  Never imagined I’d be a single dad at 19 but I wouldn’t change a thing._

_I don’t go out much and if I do it is normally to the Muggle world, so his birth has remained a secret.  Poppy helped with the delivery and prenatal visits but never asked questions about the other father even after Caelum was born with obvious Malfoy features.  Hermione and Ron know the full story and the rest of the Weasleys suspect but I think Mione and Ron told them to leave off as they’ve never outright asked._

_I don’t know what else to say except to again tell you how much I miss you and how much I wish you were here.  At the same time, I understand why you felt you had to go and I’m proud of you for following your heart.  I hope wherever you are that you are happy and well._

_HJP_

_Draco,_

_Today is Caelum’s first birthday.  This year has been crazy.  The Prophet finally got wind I had a child but since Caelum changes his appearance to whoever happens to be holding him they assume I got some random woman pregnant and that she left me and the baby.  Current money is on the idea that she is a Muggle and couldn’t handle the Metamorphmagus trait.  She was obliviated, never to be heard from again.  I see no reason to set the record straight as the only person who I’d care about knowing the truth is you and since you can’t receive my owls, I highly doubt you receive any gossip from the Prophet._

_As I said, today is Caelum’s birthday.  We had a small gathering at the Burrow just to get everyone together.  He’s still too young to know what a party is.  It was great to have the entire family together again though.  The Weasley’s have adopted him much like they did me.  Caelum’s favorite seems to be Charlie as he brings all kinds fun dragon toys and books.  As cliché as it sounds, dragons are Caelum’s favorite._

_He is growing so fast.  I still find it hard to believe we have a son.  I only wish you were here to watch him grow alongside me.  Maybe next year you will celebrate his 2 nd birthday with us.  _

_HJP_

_Draco,_

_Here we are at Caelum’s 2 nd birthday.  We had it at the Burrow again and this year he was in his element.  I wish you could have seen the joy on his face as he opened his presents.  All of the Weasley’s were there again, as well as a few of our classmates.  Caelum fell asleep about halfway through the day as he normally does but I’ve gotten so comfortable with only being around those who know about you that I didn’t think twice about him falling asleep and his normal features returning.   I know that no one there would even think about betraying my privacy, but I have to admit I was overtaken by panic when I realized he was laying there in full view of all with his distinctive blond hair poking out of the blanket.  Luna was next to me and quickly gathered him up saying she was going to put him down in a bedroom away from all the noise.  She asked me to grab his dragon plushy and point her in which way to go. _

_We spent the next hour sitting on the floor of Ron’s old room talking about you.  I haven’t talked to anyone about you in so long and it was quite therapeutic.  Once I began talking about you everything came pouring out.  I told her about Hogwarts, how you felt you had to get away and make something of yourself beyond the Malfoy name, how shocked I was to discover that I was pregnant, and how I haven’t been able to let you know anything about your amazing boy yet.  She told me how you saved her life and sanity during her imprisonment at the manor.  How you’d take down blankets, sneak in extra food, pass along nutrient potions, and how you brewed a potion that saved Ollivander’s life when he got sick._

_We laughed about things that happened through the years at Hogwarts and how no one would believe we shared a son even with proof.  It’s too extraordinary.  We cried at the things we’ve been through and over the fact that our world was so full of hate and finger pointing you felt the need to get away from it so strongly and it is causing you to miss this time with a little boy who is so full of love and joy and promise of a bright future._

_I know this letter is supposed to tell you all kinds of trivial stuff about your son and how much he’s changed this year, but I can’t bring myself to change what I’ve said.  I miss you so fucking much, Draco._

_HJP_

_Draco,_

_Reasoning with a 3-year-old is tough.  Reasoning with a 3-year-old that shares our stubbornness, determination, and manipulation skills is useless.  I love our son with everything I am, but Godric’s sweaty ball sack, the child is a force to be reckoned with.  He’s old enough now to maintain whatever face he chooses almost all day.  As he spends almost all day every day with me, normally he sports messy black hair and green eyes.  When he gets upset his hair will change colors so fast you can barely figure out what it’s changing to before it changes to another.   When he gets tired it will flicker back and forth slowly fading until I see the same little boy I tuck into bed at night.  Although he spends most of his waking hours changing his features, you still shine through in his personality._

_He has been begging to go see Uncle Charlie’s dragons.  We’ve all tried explaining that the dragons are not Uncle Charlie’s pets as he assumes he can bring a pet dragon home like Uncle Charlie.  As I said, reasoning with him is impossible.  I’ve banged my head against the wall so many times with this child it’s not even funny.  We leave this weekend to spend a few nights on the preserve and hopefully it will alleviate some of the desire for a dragon of his own at least until next year.  Merlin, I hope he’s easier to argue with next year.  Fuck, who am I kidding?  He’s only going to get more obstinate, isn’t he?_

_His birthday this year was quite a mess.  He requested it to be a dragon cake and thanks to Fred and George (sarcasm intended) it moved and blew fire.  As you can imagine, the only thing an adventurous lover of dragons can do is attempt to ride and tame the wild beast.  With accidental magic and a will as strong as his, it was easy to go from the chair he was sitting in to the back of the dragon in his heroic feat of bravery.  The poor cake didn’t have a chance and was flattened almost instantly.  I think I’ll be cleaning cake out of his hair and ears for a few days to come._

_After his party he asked to spend the night with Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron.  It’s his first sleepover and while I’m nervous, it’s also a relief to let my guard down and relax.  It’s been a long 3 years.  I cracked open a bottle of Firewhiskey and put on your new album just to hear your voice.  You are really making something of yourself and blazing your own path._

_I’m glad you’re doing well.  As much as it hurts that you aren’t here, it is comforting to at least know you are alive and thriving.  I’ll be honest with you, as I don’t even know if you’ll ever come home to get these letters, and say that while most of me understands why you left, a part of me is bitter and angry.  It took me awhile to even admit that to myself.  Most of the time the anger doesn’t even cross my mind but then there are times when I want to scream and yell at you for everything you’ve missed and for me going through this alone.  Maybe I shouldn’t have said that and simply kept this letter Caelum related, but like I said, who’s to say you’ll ever come back here?  All these years and I still miss and love you just the same as I did the day you walked away.  I always told myself I’d never tell you that in a letter.  That you deserved to hear it to your face.  Yet, I’m bitter and just drunk enough tonight to ask myself why I keep putting what you deserve in front of what I deserve._

_Fuck._

_Anyway, your son is 3 and I’m bloody wasted.  Cheers._

_HJP_

_Draco,_

_I’ve been waiting for this for 4 years and you’d think I’d have the answers to give but I don’t.  Caelum asked today at his birthday party where his mum was.  He’s finally putting together family dynamics since Bill and Fleur have had a baby and soon Hermione will as well.  I kind of choked and didn’t know what to say or do.  Luna (I’m convinced she’s a gift from the gods) stepped in and told him how some children have one mum or one dad and some have two mums or two dads and all kinds of other combinations that I’m pretty sure only make sense to Luna.  She then told him about his brave Dragon Daddy.  How he was hurt after some bad things happened and he needed some time to get better before he flew back into our lives.  That one day his Dragon Daddy would be back to tell him all about his adventures and have tales of far off lands._

_Somehow Caelum’s birthday party became an all-out story fest about you.  We talked about your Potter Stinks badges, your Quidditch skills, your thirst for knowledge, how proud you were to be a Slytherin, and how much family meant to you.  Hermione told him how you saved our lives in the Manor and Luna agreed and shared her story too. Then Fred told everyone that you were the one to shield him from an explosion during the final battle.  He said that had you not, he would have been crushed and died for sure as the ground he had been standing on was utterly destroyed. No one knew how close we had come to losing him.  It was a pretty solemn party for a while._

_Thankfully, before long Caelum’s attention diverted to when he could open presents and the topic dropped until I tucked him into bed tonight.  He told me that next year he wasn’t asking for anything for his birthday except for his Dragon Daddy to come home so he could have a piece of cake with him and learn about all his brave adventures._

_So here I sit almost 5 years later, and I can’t help but hope his wish comes true so I can see you again._

_HJP_

* * *

Draco was at a loss for words.  He looked at the bottom of the box and saw the book Harry mentioned in the first letter.  As he opened it he saw glimpses into his son’s life.  So many pictures filled the pages.  Some from the day he was born, some from birthday parties and holidays.  As the pages turned and he watched his son grow up in pictures before him.  Closer to the back there were additions of artwork and anecdotes from day to day life written among the pages.  This was his son.  He had missed out on so much and he was so angry at himself for the choices that had lead him away from the child.  He started sobbing and screaming out his anger at the universe.  After he had worn himself out and ran out of tears he realized that there was nothing to say to make it better or erase the past but there was the possibility to have a future together. 

 

With that thought in mind he wiped his face off and summoned parchment and a quill to pen his reply.  He told Harry he’d meet him at the Leaky at 8:30 and they could decide where to go to talk from there.  He called for an elf to take the letter to the owlery and spent the rest of the night rereading the letters and going through the scrapbook countless times. 


	2. Chapter 2

Harry wiped the sleep from his eyes and grumbled as he rolled out of bed.  He had spent most of the night sitting up staring at the flames in the fireplace and drinking too much Firewhiskey.  When Draco’s owl came in he nearly threw up with nerves.  It was well past 4 in the morning when he pulled himself into bed to attempt to get at least a couple of hours of sleep.  He managed to drift off for an hour or two before his alarm began to wail bringing him back to a reality he wasn’t sure he was ready to face.

He made his way into Caelum’s room to wake him and got him set up at the table with a bowl of cereal and some juice.  He then pulled out this mobile and sent off a text asking Hermione if she or Ron could be on call to pick up Caelum.  He didn’t know how long the talk with Draco would take or how it would go so a backup plan was the safe choice.  Then he checked in with Fred to make sure George was feeling better today and let them know he wouldn’t be in today. 

He wasn’t sure what to tell Caelum about Draco being back in town.  He wasn’t sure what kind of relationship Draco might want with his son or even if he would.  Draco’s owl was short and to the point.  A time and a place and nothing more.  He didn’t want to blindside Caelum if Draco did want a place in his life.  Yet, he didn’t want to hurt him if Draco didn’t.  In the end he decided to err on the side of caution and wait.  “Caelum, I’ve got a meeting with someone today that might make me late to pick you up from school.  So, Aunt Mione or Uncle Ron might pick you up instead, okay?” 

“If they do does that mean I get to go back to Grandma’s today too?” Caelum loved spending the day with his Grandma because she let him bake all kinds of fun experiments and told him he was the best kitchen helper in years. 

“Maybe, I’m not sure.  If not, we can always head over this weekend.” With breakfast finished he sent his son upstairs to get dressed.  While Caelum brushed his teeth, Harry hopped in the shower quickly to wash off the stench of a night of too much alcohol and regret.  

They found themselves in front of the school with only minutes to spare before the bell rang.  Harry informed Caelum’s teacher of the possible change in pick up people and wished his son a good day.  There was nothing left to do but make his way to the Leaky and begin a talk with the blond he had never managed to forget. 

 

  **o.O.o**

 

Draco looked up at the door each time the bell rang in hopes it was Harry.  He’d gotten here almost an hour early because he could no longer sit and wait at the Manor.  It was now a few minutes after 8 and he was so anxious he was about to burst.  He told himself to calm down and take a deep breath and didn’t hear the bell the next time it rang which signaled Harry’s entrance.  

Harry’s eyes swept the pub before landing on Draco who was sitting in a booth with his elbows on the table and his head cradled in his hands.  He looked as apprehensive as Harry felt.  He made his way over to the booth and found he had no idea what to say so he cleared his throat and took a seat on the bench across from Draco. 

Draco looked up when he heard the sound and found himself gazing into eyes he never thought he’d see again.  The years had only made Harry more attractive.  The look of a gangly teenager was replaced by a man with just the right amount of muscle and a fierce look in his eyes that showed a vast amount of inner strength.  “Harry, I don’t even know where to begin.”  He sighed and bowed his head before saying “I have no idea what to say.  I doubt, however, you want to have this conversation here so where to?”

Harry did want privacy that the Leaky was unable to provide but didn’t want to invite Draco into his and Caelum’s home just yet.  His normal solution to avoid the gossiping public was to head to a muggle area but with Draco’s fame that was out as well.  He’d prefer a neutral site so mentally crossed out the Manor before deciding on a location.  “Let’s head to the apparition area and I’ll side along you if you don’t mind?”

Draco nodded his acceptance as he stood and replaced his coat.  They exited the tavern ignoring the whispers and stares directed at them and quickly found themselves standing in Diagon Alley’s apparition area.  The walk took no more than a minute but the tension for the upcoming conversation was so heavy on them both that it seemed to take much longer. 

Harry raised his arm and looked upon the face of the man who had at one time been all he had ever wanted.  He closed his eyes when Draco placed his hand on his forearm and collected himself before they were whisked away in apparition.  

Draco opened his eyes after landing and huffed out a laugh.   They stood in the stands of the Quidditch pitch at Hogwarts.  “While it’s obvious I’ve missed a lot of news and gossip over the years, I’m pretty sure McGonagall is still Headmistress so how in the world did you get through the wards with apparition?”  It wasn’t the first question Draco thought he’d ask Harry nor was it the most important, but it was at least a way to start a conversation.

The edges of Harry’s lips began a small curve upwards.  He threw up a powerful Notice-Me-Not charm and several privacy wards to prevent anyone who happened to venture out during classes from seeing or hearing them.  “Hogwarts likes me.”  He shrugged and took a seat.  After noticing Draco’s glare from his avoidance, he continued, “Caelum got really sick when he was 2 and no one answered the floo in the infirmary or Minerva’s office.  I have never taken him to St. Mungo’s because I don’t trust someone not to leak information to the Prophet for a pocket full of galleons.  I knew Poppy was my only option, so I grabbed him and intended to apparate to the gates and head in but was surprised to find myself standing in the middle of the infirmary instead.  After making sure Caelum was alright Minerva checked the wards and found an exception for me weaved in by Hogwarts.  It can’t be overridden or removed by the Headmistress or anyone else who has tried.  It’s all a bunch of conjecture but the best we can figure is that Hogwarts felt I protected it and allows me privileges and freedoms because of that.”

Draco wasn’t all that shocked truth be told.   Harry had always seemed to have the weirdest shit happen to him, so this was just par for the course.  “I won't pretend I don't have all kinds of questions about that but I won't push as I think we have enough to discuss today as it is.

I don’t really know what to say or where to start.  I sat up all night thinking what I’d say and trying to get the words together but it all came out as some kind of verbal vomit.  An apology is the obvious go to but what exactly am I apologizing for?  I am sorry you were left alone and had to go through all of this without me.  I’m sorry I missed out on so many years of my son’s life.  I’m sorry he doesn’t know me as anything more than an idea of a person.  I’m sorry I hurt you by walking away. 

But then at the same time I remember who I was when I did walk away and wonder if it wasn’t for the best.  I don’t know if you realize how broken I still was.  I started drinking heavily but soon that didn’t numb the pain enough.  After joining the band, I discovered muggle drugs and never imagined they’d have much affect on me.  It didn’t take long until I was spending a few thousand a month on cocaine and sleeping with whoever happened to look my way.  The future I had always imagined for myself was gone so what did it matter if I screwed up whatever life I was faced with now was my thinking, I guess. 

We were doing a show in New York about a year after I joined when I overdosed.  We were on the last leg of the tour and were planning on taking some time off before recording the next album.  I didn’t know mixing alcohol and cocaine was dangerous and probably wouldn’t have cared if I had known.  One minute I was backstage waiting to go out for our set and snorting an insane amount of lines, the next I woke up in a hospital I’d never seen before.”  Draco paused and took a deep breath.  He never imagined he’d have anyone to tell this story to because he didn’t think anyone would ever matter in his life. 

“A roadie named Benji had come into my dressing room because I was late to the stage and found me mid seizure.  I didn’t know it at the time, but he was a wizard as well.  He knew who I was and apparated us to the closest magical hospital.  I was dead for several minutes according to the healers and the paperwork.  Benji demanded they continue to try to revive me and thanks to his stubbornness I’m here today.”

Draco looked over at Harry and saw the tears streaming down his face.  “I never knew.  How – no, why did you hide how hurt you still were before you left?  How didn’t your overdose make news?  God, Draco, why did you do that to yourself?”

“I hid because that’s all I’ve ever known.  I cared about you, but I had no reason to believe you wanted anything more out of our situation that what we had.  Maybe if I had thought there was a chance at a relationship I would have been more open, but I doubt it.  I was still too self-destructive.  I would have lashed out at you, so that I felt able to walk away and destroy myself. 

As far as it making news, there’s potions to help with addiction and withdrawal.  Between those and a story about a strong case of laryngitis, it was easy to keep it hidden.  Actually, the only people besides the healers that know are Benji, myself, and now you.   The band all believes the story about sickness and vocal rest.”  Draco sighed.  “Harry, I’ve done so many things I’m not proud of in my life.  I couldn’t begin to even pick out a worst but I’ve never felt as empty or as lost as I did last night when I found out what I’d unknowingly left behind.  Please, give me a chance to show you how sincere I am in saying I want to be a part of his life.” He looked up into Harry’s eyes and didn’t know if he was imagining the flash of hurt or not but decided to lay all his cards on the table anyway.  “I would also like a chance to be a part of yours if there is a place for me.  If not, I understand, but I would like to get to know my son either way.  Can you please tell me about him?”

Harry felt his brain and his heart both might explode with all this information.  He knew today was going to be full of possible heartache and revelations, but he never would have pictured Draco’s life going as it had.  And while he assumed he’d want a place in Caelum’s life, he didn’t allow himself to think that Draco would also want a place in his.  There was so much to process and work through and Harry still hadn’t really told Draco anything about Caelum.  He settled in and began to speak.


	3. Chapter 3

“Well, I guess the easiest place to start would be the beginning.  I went into eighth year with no plans on what to do after graduation, as you know.  After you left I really was just more confused as to who I was and what I wanted.  I sat around Grimmauld for longer than I care to admit without leaving and only seeing Hermione or Ron when they’d pop in.  I hadn’t been feeling well for a couple of months but didn’t think much of it.  I hadn’t been sleeping or eating well and between that and the depression I had still yet to overcome, I wrote it off as nothing when I could even be bothered to worry about myself. 

It was around the middle of August when I passed out the first time.  I didn’t think anything of it but told myself I’d eat more.  A few weeks later and I passed out again, but Kreacher couldn’t wake me.  He went to get Hermione and Ron, but by the time they had returned I was coming to.  After a huge lecture from her about healthy eating habits and how I needed to get out and focus on the future and not the past we sat down and had a huge heart to heart.  I told them about you.  I told them about the guilt and the nightmares.  I finally told them about the Dursley’s.   I pretty much told them everything…..”  Here Harry let the conversation drift off for a few seconds as he got lost in the past.

“Anyway, it was decided that they’d move in to both keep an eye on me and kick me in the arse when needed.  For a month things seemed to be going better, I was eating a bit better and we’d venture out somewhere at least once a week and life seemed to be getting back on track.  But I couldn’t shake the tiredness and had begun to put on weight unexpectedly.  I’d randomly be so exhausted I’d fall asleep at the table almost in the middle of dinner.  Hermione, being Hermione, was determined to figure out what was wrong as I had refused to go to Mungo’s.  She researched curses, depression, muggle illnesses, magical illnesses, you name it and I can almost guarantee you that she looked into it. 

In the end though, it was Ron who put us onto the right track.  I’ve never seen him so uncomfortable or cringed so much when he asked about our sex life.  Hermione was upstairs digging through the library after dinner as she normally did, and Ron and I were outside relaxing. 

 

*Flashback*

_“Alright mate, as much as I really do not want to ask this or want to know this, I don’t think Mione is going to get to where I think she might need to be if my hunch is correct.”  Ron drained his beer and sat back with a great sigh.  Asking your best mate if he took it up the arse from Malfoy or gave it wasn’t a conversation he ever wanted to have but desperate times and all.  “You and Malfoy,” he began “you never really said much other than that you had a relationship of sorts.  Am I right in assuming you had sex?”  At Harry’s nod he continued on, “Alright, so…..without trying to make this too awkward, were you the top or the bottom?”_

_Harry had been amused with Ron’s obvious discomfort up until he spit out that last question.  Now he was just mystified as to why Ron would care or why he brought it up.  “Ron, what the…?  Why are you asking this?”_

_“Listen, I know you probably are thinking I’m prying or wondering why I care, but I promise it might prove to be the reason for what’s going on.  I couldn’t care less that you like blokes, nor do I really care what goes on in your time with said blokes, but this I need to know.  I promise it will all make sense in the end, so please just answer the question.”_

_“This conversation is too bizarre for words.  Um…I was mainly the bottom.  We did both ways but yah, I prefer to bottom.  Not that I understand why you need to know, but there’s your answer.  Now why in Godric’s name did you need to know that?”_

_“Bollocks.  Alright, well mate, it’s like this, I don’t think you or Hermione are ever going to figure this out on your own because it’s impossible in the muggle world so you’d neither ever consider including it.  I think you might be pregnant.”  As Harry burst out laughing Ron wiped his face with his hand and pressed on. “Listen, I’m being serious.  I know it sounds crazy, but it is possible.  It’s uncommon and several things have to line up just right, but it is possible.”_

_“Wait, you’re serious?  You’re not screwing around?”  The panic was starting to seep into his voice.  There was no way in hell he was pregnant.  He was a man for fuck’s sake!  “Ron, I need you to be completely honest like I’ve never needed you to be before.  Are you fucking with me right now?”_

_“Harry, I’d never joke about this.  Both wizards must have above average strength of magic and have a very compatible magic.  Sometimes you have one or the other but rarely both and even if you have two wizards who fit both criteria, that doesn’t mean they are bent or attracted to each other.”_

_Harry was lost in his thoughts at this point.  Draco’s wand responded to him almost like his own but didn’t think that was too far out of the ordinary.  Come to think of it, Draco had grabbed his holly wand a few times by accident while half asleep and cast with no issue before noticing the mistake.  He thought back to Neville’s issue the first few years of Hogwarts and how he had trouble with his father’s wand.  Harry had never really thought much of their wands being somewhat interchangeable and didn’t know if Draco thought much of it either._

_Was this possible?  How did Ron know about it and Hermione didn’t?  Ron was right in thinking that it would never cross his mind as a possibility with his muggle upbringing, but Hermione was a walking encyclopedia of knowledge.  She had to have at least ran across this a time or two, right?  He asked Ron how he had heard about this._

_He shrugged. ”It’s just something we kind of grow up knowing?  Like, it’s not out of the ordinary for us.  I’ve seen a few pregnant wizards through the years but never thought to point it out as I wouldn’t point out a pregnant witch either.  It just is.  Uncommonly common.”_

_“So you think…..I’m pregnant? I just….what the fuck am I going to do?  I can’t do this.”_

_“We’re going to call Mione to come down and tell her what we’ve been talking about.  That will point her in a direction to look and we will go from there.  You are not alone.  You will never be alone.  No matter what may come, you’ve got us.  We will figure it out together and be here for you.  No matter what.”_

*End Flashback*

 

“It didn’t take long to discover Ron was right.  Shocked the hell out of me and her both.  It took another month before I agreed I needed to at least find someone to help with delivery and such.  From there we let in Poppy and Minerva.  Eventually, I told the Weasleys I was pregnant, but Ron and Hermione were the only ones for a long time who knew you were the other Father. 

Hermione and Ron were in with me when I had him.  It was evident as soon as Poppy handed him to me whose he was.  Your hair is quite distinctive.”  Harry looked up and shared a smile with Draco.

“Poppy never questioned or pressed, then or now.  Even when Caelum got sick before and she wasn’t sure if it was a hereditary issue or not, she just said she had ‘checked all relevant medical information available and it did not appear to be an issue from either parent’.  It’s kind of became one of those things that those close to me know, but no one really talks about or asks any questions.”

Harry then asked the question he had been wondering ever since he had the conversation with Ron all those years ago. “Draco, did you know this was possible?  I wouldn’t say I was angry when I found out, but the way Ron talked, it was common knowledge in pureblood homes.”

“As unbelievable as it is, no, I did not.  Father, as you can imagine, was not happy that I preferred wizards to witches.  It was not acceptable behavior for the Malfoy heir.  My responsibility was to bury any ‘perverse’ thoughts and desires, marry a respectable pureblood witch, have her bear me a son, and raise him into a proper Malfoy.  He would have removed any book that mentioned it from the library and banned Mother from even speaking of the possibility.” 

Draco was furious with his father’s schemes and lies.  He had been harshly punished when his father found out he was eyeing up more wizards than witches.  Not with his hands, no that was too muggle for Father.  The man wasn’t one of the Dark Lord’s most trusted for no reason.  Some of the spells he’d suffered under the man’s wand were the stuff of nightmares.  A mixture of Dark Arts and lovely secret Malfoy family spells.  He doubted he’d ever forgive Pansy for that.   Her jealousy and envy led her to tell her father who used it to hold over his father’s head.  He still hadn’t figured out how that was supposed to endear him to her, but he’d never really understood the workings of her head as it was. 

“I’m honestly relieved to hear that.  I won’t lie and say the thought that you could have known and walked away not caring never crossed my mind, but I always hoped you just didn’t know.

Anyway, there’s so much to tell you about him and I could go on about him for days.  The letters are just the tip of the iceberg of how amazing our son is.  He’s fiercely loyal to his loved ones. He craves learning anything and everything he can.  He comes up with the most insane plots and doesn’t think twice about following through with them.  He can manipulate a situation to suit his desires so well that you don’t even realize he’s done so until the conversation is over.  I don’t think that the hat will know what to do with him.  He’s extraordinary.

As for us?  I don’t know.  I want to say yes, but at the same time I want to run screaming the other way.  So much would depend on what your plans are.  You want to get to know Caelum, but how do you plan to do that?  Are you going to continue your life as it is now, playing a show in a new town every night?  Are you going to put down roots and move back here?

Caelum must come first no matter if we decide to pursue a relationship or not.   I think the best thing we could do at this point is put our feelings aside and focus on him and building a relationship for the two of you.  Maybe when that’s stable we can look at if there can be an us or not.  I doubt my feelings for you will ever really change and while I’ve gone on a few dates here and there with others, it’s not anything I’ve ever bothered with. 

I guess I’m saying, we will still be here in the long run.  If the feelings and desire is there, then we’ll see where it leads.”

Draco sat nodding in agreement.  “I can understand your reasoning and while I had hoped we could try now, I respect your choice.  I’m not going anywhere, and I can wait as long as you need for you to feel comfortable with it all. 

As far as plans go, I’ve been feeling disheartened for several months with the life I’m leading now.  I’m no longer the angst-ridden teenager trying to run from his problems.  I talked to the band and it’s one of the main reasons we decided to add on a small tour here.  I wanted to see what it felt like coming back home and if I felt ready for that.  It’s safe to say, there’s nothing that could keep me away from getting to know Caelum and being here for him. 

I’ll have to finish up this last leg of the tour, but that’s only another 5 or 6 shows.  Our contract with the record company is fulfilled at the end of it.  They tried to get us to sign a new one right before we left, but thankfully the guys had my back and we decided to wait until afterwards to decide what to do.”

As the wind blew through the stands Harry couldn’t help but feel everything was falling into place almost perfectly.  It had been a long time since things had lined up so well and he couldn’t help but fear that things were almost too easy.  “Draco, are you sure?  I don’t want you to give your life up only for you to regret it and be resentful years down the road.  If you want to continue with the band, it will be difficult, but not impossible.  With all the technology out there now and portkeys, we can figure something out.”

“I’m positive.  Before your owl came last night, I was walking through the manor and realized I hadn’t been happy with the life I was leading for quite a while.  I was complacent and bored.  I don’t know exactly what I set out to prove to myself when I left, but I can’t help but feel that it either doesn’t matter or I’ve done it now.  There’s no longer a drive to stay away from Britain and all things magical.  Knowing of Caelum and the possibility to have a relationship again with you one day?  No way could I walk away from that.”  Draco smiled looking at Harry’s gorgeous face.  “Besides, the boy needs his Dragon Daddy full time as much as his Dragon Daddy needs him.”

With that Harry felt his heart tighten and wondered if it was possible to fall in love with someone more every day.  They spent the next couple of hours exchanging stories that had happened to each of them through the past few years as well as reminiscing over their years at Hogwarts. “Well, I won’t lie, I’m ecstatic to know you’re planning on staying and Caelum will be too.  I haven’t told him you are in town or that I was meeting you today.  I wasn’t sure how it would go.”

“When did you plan on doing that?  I don’t want to rush you or him, but I am dying to meet him.”  Draco, who had always been one to veer towards the dramatic, wasn’t even kidding.  His thoughts since last night centered solely on that beautiful little boy and his incredible father. 

Harry glanced at his watch and saw that while they were sitting there time had flown by and Caelum’s school let out in another 5 minutes. “I didn’t realize it was as late as it was already. Give me a moment to let someone know to grab Caelum from school.” He pulled out his mobile and sent off a message in his group chat with Hermione and Ron to see if either of them were able to grab Caelum.  He wanted to finalize some plans with Draco while he was here in front of him.  Ron quickly replied he was done for the day and was already waiting outside on the steps for him.  Harry thanked him and told him he’d call when he left to figure out where they were.  “Ron is going to pick him up.  If I know my son like I think I do, he will talk his uncle into ice cream and dropping into the twin’s shop.  I don’t want to overwhelm him with you just showing up so let me take him home and at least tell him you are here.  Are you free for dinner tonight?  Normally on Friday nights a bunch of us from school get together and have a pot luck free for all dinner starting around 7.  You could come over to mine around 3 and meet him.  If you’re comfortable with it, you are welcome to stay for dinner or we can meet up tomorrow at the park.”

Draco let out a sigh of relief.  He was terrified Harry would have changed his mind after hearing all that he’d revealed today.  “Perfect.  Should I bring anything for dinner?”

“Nah, you will be more than enough.” Harry winked at Draco teasingly.  “You can help Caelum and I bake cookies before everyone heads over.  Did you want me to apparate you down to the gate or anywhere?  I’m going to head out to meet Ron.”

“I appreciate the offer, but I think I’m just going to sit here a while and think.  I can’t wait to see you and Caelum in a couple of hours.”  Draco felt his heart was going to burst with all the joy he was feeling.  Harry nodded his acceptance and smiled before disappearing in front of Draco’s eyes.  As Draco sat in the stands processing everything he had learned in less than 24 hours he couldn’t help but wonder what his son would think of him.  With a grin he stood and made his way to the gates.  He was meeting his son in less than 3 hours.  He couldn’t show up empty handed so he was off to Harrods.  He had to find the perfect gift for his dragon loving little boy.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I think this is going to have one more chapter around the same length and possibly a small epilogue. Hope you enjoy.


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